I have to admit, I’d been fully expecting that the all-women reboot of Ghostbusters was going to smash the patriarchy once and for all. But disappointedly not, as there are STILL sleestack lizard people legislating against women’s health, women’s equality, and women’s rights to yoga pants as business casual.

So when I heard Wonder Woman was going to take up Thor’s Hammer and Hulk Smash the ever-lovin’ shit out of this sexist, misogynist universe, can you blame me for being a skoosh-bit dubious? But boy howdy, was I wrong! Since Wonder Woman’s release, we’re now living in a post-sexist society. Thank goodness! And right in the nick of time! Color me relieved.

And can you believe there’s outrage and protest against a women-only screening? I can’t. Wonder Bras are exclusively for women too, but you don’t see anyone picketing Victoria’s Secret because there’s no lingerie for men, no Wonder Bros for dudes. I haven’t read any op-eds about the menz complaining about women’s bathrooms, or women’s prayer groups, or women’s volleyball. But that’s all moot now, anyway! Because of Wonder Woman we’re living in a post-sexist society! Yay!

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I heard that Melania Trump saw a women-only viewing of Wonder Woman and now she just can’t even. How’s that for empowerment? Reportedly she told Donald to go eff himself. If that’s true we’re in for a wild ride—for the better I’d say. Of course, Melania is going to demand she fly around in an invisible airplane circling Central Park and of course she will add truth lassos and indestructible bracelet cuffs to her fashion collection. Go Melania!

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Some women reported having had a religious experience while watching Wonder Woman. I don’t mean to minimize anyone’s else’s divine inspiration but that happens to me whenever I sit on the washing machine during its spin cycle.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m one hundred percent down with smashing the patriarchy if it means I can stay up all night watching the LIFETIME Channel and drinking box wine.

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So what’s next? Now that all of womankind’s menses days are in synch, infertility is a thing of the past, and sperm is obsolete due to some freakish force of nature that causes women to conceive like leopard sharks or Komodo dragons. Can we elect a woman president already? Can I get my spouse to empty the cat box or remember to buy toilet paper? I know that might seem petty, but it’s the little things that matter the most to me. If I could talk about my feelings for once without my partner falling asleep, that’d also be super.

Tiffany Midge is a poetry editor for The Rumpus, and an award-winning author of The Woman Who Married a Bear. Her work is featured in McSweeney’s, Okey-Pankey, The Butter, Waxwing, and Moss. She is Hunkpapa Lakota. Follow her on Twitter @TiffanyMidge